A Harley can go for more than one ride in an hour.

Harleys never develop spare tires.

Harleys last longer.

Harleys don't get you pregnant.

A Harley doesn't care what time of month it is.

Harleys don't have parents.

Your Harley will let you know if something is wrong.

Your Harley won't judge your friends.

If your Harley is boisterous, you can buy a muffler.

You won't have to put your Harley through grad school.

If your Harley smokes you can do something about it.

Harleys don't care about how many other Harleys you have ridden.

When riding, you and your Harley both arrive at the same time.

One Harley will satisfy you every time.

Your Harley won't ogle other Harleys.

Your Harley won't care if you have a poster of your fantasy Harley.

If your Harley has high mileage, you can just get a new one.

Harleys don't care about breast size.

If your Harley is too soft you can get new shocks.

If your Harley is misaligned, you don't have to discuss politics to correct it.

You don't have to drink beer before your Harley looks appealing.

You can be proud of your Harley regardless of the model.

You don't have to go to Tiffany's to register your Harley.

Your Harley won't beat you or try to make you feel inferior.

You can ride a Harley as long as you want and it won't get limp.

Your parents won't keep in touch with your old Harley after you dump it.

Harleys always feel like going for a ride when you do.

Harleys don't insult you if you are a novice.

Your Harley never wants a night out alone with the other Harleys.

Harleys don't make you late.

You don't have to primp before riding your Harley.

Your Harley won't complain when you use protection.

If your Harley doesn't look good, you can paint it or get better parts.

You can't get a disease from a Harley.

Your Harley won't care if you fake it.

Harleys are always ready to stop when you are.

Your Harley has a built in vibrator.

Your Harley doesn't have to show off in front of other Harleys.

Your Harley won't lie to you.

Your Harley doesn't care how heavy you are.

In the morning, your Harley won't poke you in the back when it wants to go for a ride.

Your Harley won't shrink when it's cold.

If your Harley can't fire up, you can just replace the battery.

You don't have to cook for your Harley.

Your Harley can't ride around behind your back.

If your Harley is cold you can choke it.

Your Harley is always the right size because if it seems too small you can just get a new one.

You can keep photos of your old Harleys.

Your Harley would rather go for a ride than watch sports.

Your Harley can go for multiple rides.

Harleys don't need pick-up lines.

You only have to ride your Harley when you want to.

Your Harley won't go for rides by itself.

If baldness occurs, you can replace the tires.

Harleys don't snore.

Your Harley will never leave you or break your heart!

You can get a sore butt from riding your Harley and your friends won't make fun of you! (Submitted by Tigger)

If you take care of your Harley, it will never get to old for you to ride it. (Submitted by grigio)

Your Harley will never make you sleep in the wet spot. (Submitted by "Big Daddy" Foster)

You don't necessarily need a shower before and after you take your Harley for a ride. (Submitted by Unknown)

You aren't expected to blow your Harleys tail pipe. (Submitted by Unknown)

You can always get a newer model with no hassles. (Submitted by Unknown)

A Harley is actually valuable. (Submitted by Unknown)

If your Harley gets bad gas, you don't have to leave or die, just pour in a gas additive. (Submitted by Unknown)

If you go out without your Harley, it won't ask you where you've been, who you were with, and what you did when you come home. (Submitted by Unknown)

You don't have to buy beer for your Harley. (Submitted by Unknown)

You don't have to share your paycheck with your Harley. (Submitted by Unknown) Now that one is debatable!!!  

Your Harley will never bitch at you if you mount it improperly. (Submitted by Unknown)

You don't have to stroke your Harley to get it to perform. (Submitted by Unknown)